Should You Do a First Look or Get Ready Together?

Tradition says that couples who are getting married can’t see each other before the ceremony – that the first time you’ll lock eyes on the big day is when you’re about to tie the knot. But, if you’ve decided to elope, your wedding day is anything but traditional, and that means you get to make all the rules!

For a lot of couples, not being able to see each other for the first half of the day just doesn’t feel right – and luckily, you’ve got a few options for hanging out together before you exchange vows. Some couples choose to separate when they get ready, then do a first look, and others just get ready together, spending the entire day with each other!

So, should you do a first look, or get ready for your elopement together? This guide will help you answer the question!

What is a First Look?

First, we have to talk about what a first look is! It’s a newer trend, so some couples may not know exactly how it works.

If you decide to do a first look, you’ll split up to get ready for the day. Some couples decide not to see each other during the getting ready process at all, while others do hair and makeup and then split up to put their attire on – so how you do this is totally up to you!

When it’s time for the first look, your photographer will help you figure out how to make it happen. You’ll choose a spot for one of you to stand, so that you can’t see your partner. Then the other person will walk up behind the first, tap them on the shoulder, and they’ll turn around. You’ll see each other for the first time, all glammed up and ready for the day! It’s a sweet moment, and one that a lot of couples really treasure after the day is over.

Should You Do a First Look?

Here are some reasons to consider doing a first look!

It Builds Anticipation

One great thing about doing a first look, instead of getting ready together, is that it builds anticipation and excitement! You can totally do breakfast together and hang out, and then split up when it’s time to start getting ready. That time apart, where you’re getting ready for the day, can be really exciting! It gives you a chance to enjoy those happy butterflies, that “I’m getting married!” feeling, and get excited.

Then, when it’s time for the first look, you’ll have an amazing moment that you’ve been looking forward to.

Spend Time With Guests

If you have family or friends joining you for your elopement, this gives you an opportunity to spend some time with them, and getting ready with a loved one can be really special. A lot of couples have a parent, sibling, or a good friend with them for this part of the day, and though you’re away from your partner, being able to spend time laughing, celebrating, and maybe having a few mimosas with loved ones is a great addition to your elopement day!

Have Time Alone With Your Partner

This one is also for couples who are inviting a few guests to their elopement. While being around friends and family is great, it’s also nice to have a little time for yourselves – and doing a first look alone, away from everyone else, gives you a chance to relax and be together before the ceremony and the adventures begin. Your elopement should definitely be fun, but when all that planning and anticipation comes together, it can also be a lot – so having that time to just be together, talk, and remember what it’s all about can be amazing! So many couples say that all their wedding-day nerves completely melted away when they saw each other for the first time.

An Emotional Moment

Another great reason to do a first look on your elopement day is that it creates a really special, emotional moment that you’ll remember forever. You’ll see each other for the first time, take it all in, and having that moment together can be really meaningful. It also makes for some great photos!

Should You Get Ready Together?

The day you get married is about the two of you – and eloping is all about spending time together and celebrating your story. So for a lot of couples, splitting up to get ready doesn’t make sense, or just doesn’t feel right. 

Here are some reasons to get ready together instead of doing a first look or waiting for the ceremony to see each other!

Spending Time Together

Of course, one of the biggest reasons that couples decide to get ready together for their elopement is just that it gives you more time with each other, and instead of splitting up, you can enjoy the start of your elopement day together.  

You Can Help Each Other

For a lot of people, your partner is your best friend – so things like dress or suit shopping just aren’t the same without them! If you’re not worried about them seeing your attire before the ceremony, you can be involved in picking each other’s outfits, and on the day of, if you get ready together, you might help do each other’s hair, put on jewelry, help your partner tie a tie…. Getting ready together allows you to really enjoy the process, together!

Calm Your Nerves

Getting ready together can also be amazing for those pre-wedding butterflies. It’s totally normal to be nervous on your elopement day – all the planning you did and all the excitement leading up to it comes together! Being with your partner as you get ready can calm those jitters, and make the beginning of the day much more relaxing.

Should You Do a First Look or Get Ready Together?

When it comes down to it, there’s one thing that’s most important when it comes to deciding if you should do a first look or get ready together – and that’s what feels right to you! Listen to your gut, and if it’s telling you that not splitting up feels more like the two of you, or if it’s telling you that you want that emotional first look moment, you should do whatever you want on the day you get married. And if you don’t have an immediate gut reaction, talk with your partner, weigh the pros and cons of each, and decide together!

As an elopement planner, my job is to make sure that each couple has the adventurous elopement day of their dreams – so whether you want to do a first look or get ready together, I’ll put together a timeline and a plan for your day that’s perfect for the two of you. If you’re ready for your one-of-a-kind elopement day, contact me!